Convicted at church.

Thus says the LORD:
You say, "The LORD's way is not fair!"
Hear now, house of Israel:
Is it my way that is unfair, or rather, are not your ways unfair?
When someone virtuous turns away from virtue to commit iniquity, and dies,
it is because of the iniquity he committed that he must die.
But if he turns from the wickedness he has committed,
he does what is right and just,
he shall preserve his life;
since he has turned away from all the sins that he has committed,
he shall surely live, he shall not die.    Ezekiel 18:25-28
This was the first reading at Mass today.  And it really began to convict me.  It got me thinking about how a person's heart can truly be turned to God at even the very last moment of his life.  If the person will just turn away from sin.  It's hard to understand sometimes, that turning away from money, comfort, and control of your life can actually preserve your life.  
Heaven seems so far off, sometimes.  
God seems so distant sometimes.
And yet both thing could be brought before you in the blink of an eye. 


I was convicted later in Mass during the gospel reading (Matthew 21:28-32), where again the point of conversion was stressed...it was the story of the man with 2 sons, one of whom said that he would not go work in the vineyard (after being asked by his father), but later changed his mind. 
Something changed in his heart, which allowed him to obey his father. 
And it changed after he had initially rejected making the right choice.

And so it can be with those we love....or maybe even with our own self! 

I have been rejecting an opportunity to forgive.  I received some devotional emails on the topic of forgiveness and have been avoiding them for about a week and a half now.  It's too hard.  It's too much to read.  I thought I already forgave...but why do I still have all these angry feelings?? 

I know what is the right thing to do.  I've been telling the Lord, "it isn't fair", just like in the first reading.   And maybe some things are more difficult to forgive when you are living them.  It's not always a past hurt, but sometimes it is in the present....I guess forgiveness can be in the present too.  Maybe some people have to pray for the strength to forgive on a daily basis...

Good thing God is near.